Railside's Home

Location: Whitewater, Wisconsin, United States

nothing to say

Monday, September 27, 2004

who would have thought Elzar could cause depression

Sunday, September 26, 2004


well its another birthday spent alone, oh joy of joys. at least james and andera rembered (unlike the rest of the universe) went to chicago on the 25th and spent some money, got a scarf from Barnies rather then the Loro Piana because it saved me $510 found a diamond i wanted to buy in cartier but was in a setting and totalled $480,000 plus tax so maybe later. Stopped at bang and olufsen and i think i know what computer speakers i'm going to get when i get everything remodeled. Ate at Magnums which honstally i am glad we did over Basil Thai since Magnums is a 3 star place and i hav beeen to the thai place before. Got the Creed Body wash, which i have been waiting for plus a shit load of cookies. other then that...i love driving in down town esp when i cut across 6 lanes of traffic. so happy birthday to me happ.....ah screw it

Thursday, September 23, 2004

live through film

my life: Fight Club
my life as i want it to be: Crash
my life as it will be: Leaving Las Vegas

I know this post is weak, weak as hell.

have not posed in awhile so though should show people i am still alive for the time being. not much else to say other then dissapointments on all fronts

Sunday, September 12, 2004


I was board going through my Bartlets and i foudn some fun quotes...have fun

Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired signifies, in the final sense, a theft from those who hunger and are not fed; those who are cold and are not clothed- President Dwight D.Eisenhower, April 16, 1953

I do not find in our particular superstition of Christianity one redeeming feature.....Millions of innocent men, women and children, since the introduction of Christianity, have been burned, tortured, fined and imprisoned. What has been the effect of this coercion?To make half the world fools and half hypocrites; to support roguery and error all over the world.- Thomas Jefferson

Japan was already defeated ... dropping the bomb was completely unnecessary. I thought that our country should avoid shocking world opinion by the use of a weapon whose employment was no longer necessary to save American lives- General Dwight D.Eisenhower, Supreme Allied Commander, Europe, and later US President.

Who accepted the Grand Cross of the German Eagle - the highest medal that Nazi Germany could bestow on foreigners - in July 1938, four months after the German annexation of Austria ?- Henry Ford. (The following month a senior executive of General Motors, James Mooney, received a similar medal for his "distinguished services to the Reich".)

With reference to Tiger Woods' first Golf Masters win, who said there'll be a spectacular increase in the number of black boys (and I do mean boys - teenagers) who begin to infest the public courses in America ?- Alistair Cooke in his BBC Letter from America, May 2, 1997

Who presented Chairman Mao Tse Tung with a bouquet of poems that lavishly praised the Chinese leader as the timely rain to nourish the land ?- The Dalai Lama, on his first meeting with Mao in Beijing (then Peking) in 1954

Who blocked the marriage of his son and disowned him, commenting How can I, who has always advocated renunciation of sex, encourage you to gratify it ?
(The son subsequently became a homeless alcoholic.)- Mahatma Gandhi, dealing with his son Harilal.

Which founding father said of the proposed American Constitution This is likely to be administered for a course of years and then end in despotism ... when the people shall become so corrupted as to need despotic government, being incapable of any other ?- Benjamin Franklin in a speech to delegates to the US Constitutional Convention prior to the final vote.

The use of quantity of money as a target has not been a success. I'm not sure that I would as of today push it as hard as I once did. - Milton Friedman in Financial Times (UK) June 7, 2003

Who said of Saddam Hussein He has not developed any significant capability with respect to weapons of mass destruction. He is unable to project conventional power against his neighbours ?- Colin Powell in February 2001

Who said of containment against Saddam Hussein We are able to keep arms from him. His military forces have not been rebuilt ?- Condoleezza Rice in July 2001

I do not consider Hitler to be as bad as he is depicted. He is showing an ability that is amazing and seems to be gaining his victories without much bloodshed ?- Mahatma Gandhi, May 1940

I am strongly in favour of using poisonous gas against uncivilised tribes ... to spread a lively terror ?- Winston Churchill, writing as President of the Air Council, in 1919

Who granted several audiences to, and received a donation of more than $1 million from Shoko Asahara, leader of the Supreme Truth cult of Japan, and spreader of sarin gas in the Tokyo subway ?- The Dalai Lama, in 1982

Which politician travelled to Indonesia and received a $10 million donation from dictator Suharto to help party funds, while avoiding criticism of Indonesia's repressive policies, including political imprisonment ?- Nelson Mandela, in October 1990, six months after his own release from prison

Who warned of the acquisition of unwarranted influence by the US military-industrial complex and its potential to endanger liberties and the democratic processes ?- President Eisenhower, in his Final Address to the Nation, January 17, 1961

If our country were defeated, I hope we should find a champion as admirable (as Hitler) to restore our courage and lead us back to our place among the nations ?- Winston Churchill, in his Great Contemporaries, 1937

Who was an enthusiastic and uncritical guest of the dictatorships of Haiti and Albania, and the phalangists in Lebanon ?- Mother Teresa of Calcutta

Who referred to the Munich chapter of the German Communist Party as chaotic, filthy and full of Jews ?- Eugenio Pacelli, later Pope Pius XII

With reference to the US conquest and annexation of a third of Mexico, who said : What has miserable, inefficient Mexico to do with the great mission of peopling the New World with a noble race ?- Walt Whitman

Who urged suspicious attention to any proposed new law or regulation that comes from businessmen, because they have generally an interest to deceive and even to oppress the public?- Adam Smith in The Wealth of Nations

Who wrote of God: He says naïvely, outspokenly and without suggestion of embarrassment "I, the Lord thy God, am a jealous God."
It is only another way of saying "I, the Lord thy God, am a small God; fretful about small things"
?- Mark Twain, in Letters from the Earth

Who declared homosexuality to be immoral and disgusting ?- Ayn Rand, at her Ford Hall appearance, 1971

To occupy Iraq would instantly shatter our coalition, turning the whole Arab world against us and make a broken tyrant into a latter-day hero ... assigning young soldiers to a fruitless hunt for a securely entrenched dictator and condemning them to fight in what would be an un-winnable urban guerilla war. It could only plunge that part of the world into even greater instability.- George Bush Snr, in A World Transformed, 1998

Who paid an official visit to China, described Beijing as ghastly and warned a group of foreign students If you stay here much longer, you'll all be slitty-eyed ? - The Duke of Edinburgh, 1986

Who demonised Jews and urged the destruction of their synagogues and houses, the seizing of their valuables and the denial of their prayer books and passports ? - Martin Luther, in his 1543 pamphlet Concerning the Jews and their Lies

Who said The word and working of God is quite clear; that women were made to be either wives or prostitutes ?- Martin Luther

Who expressed humanitarian abhorrence of the death penalty, declaring that to kill a man in a paroxysm of passion is understandable, but to have him killed by someone else after calm and serious meditation and on the pretext of duty honourably discharged is incomprehensible- The Marquis deSade

Who, commenting on World War Two, said: The Jews should have offered themselves to the butcher's knife. They should have thrown themselves into the sea from cliffs- Mahatma Gandhi to biographer Louis Fisher in June 1946.

Which country elected a World War II fascist war criminal (Class A) as a peacetime leader ?- Japan: Tojo cabinet minister Nobusuke Kishi became Prime Minister in 1957, eight years after his release from prison.


Monday, September 06, 2004

a moment of reflection

Well today is labor day, one of the many indications that the summer is over so I have decided to take a moment to look back and reflect upon it. Lets look at the pluses first: I have had a lot of free time to do what I want and have not had many real obligations to anyone. I have had a chance to work on my DDR skills (which I am a comparable level to James now (sad considering he owns the game and I don’t)). I have been able to spend time with my friends only thing is TJ I wish I would have gotten to know you better earlier in the summer so we could have partied- oh well there’s always Oshkosh. Jason, stay at your dads house more, its fun and I feel welcomed (not that TJ or Jason take the time to read this). It seems like every summer I acquire a new friend from McDonalds last year Jason this year TJ. Plus I got to maintain a sexual relationship for the vast majority of the summer. I don’t know if its good or bad but Jon has exiled his entire friend group (myself included obviously) to maintain a relationship (a romantic, nonsexual relationship, if that makes any sense- to me it doesn't since neither of them are Christian or a religion that opposes pre marital sex, and Laura isn’t even a virgin). Its kind of funny when ever anyone asks Jon about anything sexual he becomes offended and is even proud that they don’t kiss (or that is of July at least). I admit I thought Laura was kind of cute, but only because I have a thing for bisexual girls and lesbians- while most men I am sure would concur with my statement if they knew that the vast majority of lesbian and bisexual women were not the blonde hair, big breasted super models as seen in porn I highly doubt they would be attracted to these women, I cannot explain why I find this quality attractive but every single women I have been attracted to has been in some way or another ether lesbian or bi-curious, maybe because it is such a liberal thing in today’s culture. But anyways Jon is a fucking moron, I can only wait until those two break up Jon has no where to come crying to, although if Jon is still hell bent on suicide when they break up I will even buy him a means of death, I don’t want to spend money for a gun so it probably wont be that but the point is Jon is dead to me now. And if ether Jon or Laura happen to read this think about this for a minute: you have never had a serious fight before, Laura according to your blog you want to move far away from here some day and Jon doesn't even want to leave Muskego (from what I have gathered) how do you plan on maintaining a relationship when one of you is happy here and the other hates it? I’ll say this now and it will sound contradicting in a few minutes but I would rather be single then with Laura. Well as far as the bad stuff goes I lost Beth around the middle June, say lost and not broken up with because one has to actually break up with the other person and that never happened. Surprisingly enough I did not take that with her as bad as I did it with Jessica and that as bad as Amanda- I'm scared what will happen with James if Andréa and him break up. But it seems that after every break up I go through I seem more immune to its effects. The effects I am not immune to are those being alone, yeah friends are one thing but anyone who plutonic relationships have the same significance as romantic ones is a total moron. What also doesn't help is when ether A. all of your are in a relationship or B. the only reason they are not is because they choose to or they are indifferent about it. In addition it doesn't make matters any easier when the friends who enjoy going out and having a good time always get the women who were interested in me until the met Jason and the others dong like going out at all. Although on the bright side of that I know I will eventually find someone else because if I had the slightest inkling that I wouldn’t I would not hesitate in killing myself now- some would think that is drastic but if is important in a persons life and they knew that it was forever eliminated then the reason for maintaining life would not exist- I'm sure to most of you this makes no sense but it does to me which is all that really matters. I have started cutting myself because of this, although its been a few weeks since I have done that which I suppose is good. Plus right now I cant find a job to keep myself occupied which sucks because it prohibits me from saving money to get my sorry depressed ass out of this place plus it keeps me at home to sit around and think about all that’s wrong in my life. But not to worry, winter is coming and I’ll just get more depressed from that, OH YEAH. Plus since when I was going out with Beth we actually had a good time by doing shit which involved spending money stupid now refuses to pay anything over $200 on my credit card- meaning I'm borderline from going in debt AND on top of things everything else since my car has to sit outside in winter its going to be dead by February (according to my estimates). However the one redeeming thing I have going for me is I am sure a solution to all of these problems will come in their respective time. To change the subject I was reading the paper today and I saw my supposed prom date (for of those of you who don’t know it I will give the short version: had crush on girl from 7th grade on, finally got the balls to ask her to the prom my SR year, accepted at first, found out I was not a Christian, canceled plans because of it and refused to talk to me) in it for singing at a Christian music festival in Kenosha (Paul if you or jess were there let me know (just wondering)) now show I have some respect for her since she has made religion a priority in her life not that any of this matters anymore, but it would resolve a lot of the animosity I have. Just wondering